When Fashion Said No, I Said: Watch Me

Like many plus-size women, I grew up watching fashion from the outside. In my late 20s and early 30s, I was a size 16, hunting for clothes that made me feel powerful, seen, and beautiful—but stores like Loehmann’s and Barneys didn’t have space for bodies like mine.

What I wanted wasn’t a pair of jeans or an oversized tee. I wanted silk camisoles, latex pants, and tap shorts.  I wanted to dress like Chrissie Hynde from The Pretender or wear what I saw in Sex and the City, even when fashion said it wasn’t made for me.

So I made it myself.

But what does the fashion forward plus girl do? For me I found a genius seamstress and began designing my clothes and then my girlfriend Casonna would sew them. And because the clothes were coming out of my head I could use textiles that were never used in plus fashion. I partied on Sunset Blvd. wearing tap pants and a camisole, fetish latex pants with a dashiki, so many crazy fun fashions – always inappropriate but somehow appropriate. It was fun and by this time I’m a size 18 or 20 so there’s no fun clothes for me in the marketplace at any price. And heels. Always heels and earrings. But there are no pictures of me because even though I was having fun and getting compliments I wasn’t quite sure. I mean level of confidence was really superficial. I wish I had cared less and took more photos. That version of me deserved to be seen and preserved.

What was your style like in your 20s or 30s?
What did you want to wear — and what held you back?
What’s your experience with dressing for life in your 20s and 30s?

My favorite looks now - silk caftans, Light Sleepers, silk joggers, handmade leather jackets and more

xo, Tracy